Shadowed

Consumed in shame, as your name falls to blame..

Self hate, for their mentality, always the same..

A man you are, one left in their shun as your feelings, burn..

With every rise of the sun, your nature, their fun..

As the globe, with much to learn..

Before your life, done..

Skinny..

For your inflicted starve, in no interest of the food they serve..

The visible curve of ribs, a reality none would love to have..

Your image from a mirror, thin..

As tears, thicker than your shin..

Their sight, mean as though you were a sin..

Awaiting fatality in silence like the drop of a pin..

For past their door, you lay on the floor..

Your core, sore..

Though all they did, inflict more..

Hidden..

Keep it away..

Don’t let it show..

Let it stay shadowed..

Never let your demons see the light..

There only needs a little darkness..

For the shadows to come to life..

Crashing..

Overflowing blood..

Panic..

Sets in my bones..

I can hear the screams..

On and on..

Can’t seem to leave..

There’s no way to go..

Caged..

Like an animal in rage..

Trapped..

In a darkness..

Then it’s too much light..

I’m out of my mind..

Can anbody please hear me out?

I can’t seem to stomach it..

No need to feed..

I want to be perfect..

I sit down to eat..

Only to retch it all up..

No self control..

No one seems to ever understand..

Man up!

Real men don’t cry..

Stop being such a girl..

Don’t eat if you don’t want to, no one’s forcing you..

Leave the theatrics, those are Westernized diseases..

Do you want everyone to know you’re crazy?

I would like to be strong..

Never vulnerable..

Never emotional..

Never human..

I would be Superman..

But he also has his Kryptonite..

So who am I to be?

As there is nothing much I see..

For our kind, stuck in wishes of flee..

As your comments, the key..

To the portrayal of me..

I’m hot then I’m cold..

Stuck somewhere..

Never fitting in..

I’m angry, furious actually..

In a rage I don’t understand..

I’m breaking down, Chipping away..

All done, while wearing a smile..

None looking into my file, as broken feelings, thrown to a hurtful mile..

None would dare dial, as your heart, as though a broken tile..

As you look up in search of your Lord, for the globe would strike like a sword..

Your kind, only to nod as they showed that your feelings, just but a topic striking them bored..

~Based on true stories.

~Alby and Qamariyah.

~First writing collaboration.